82. Yi khó-lêng ē piàn-chò góa ê hū-tam
"Góa m̄-sī kóng sńg-chhiò. M̄-chai án-nóa, góa khòaⁿ tio̍h yi, chóng-sī kám-kak, í-āu yi khó-lêng ē piàn-chò góa ê hū-tam. Tō-kóng sī lí, lí nā kah-ì yi, lí tio̍h hó-hó kā koan-chhat, lí mā ē án-ne siūⁿ." Komako kā chhiú hōaⁿ tī Shimamura ê keng-thâu, óa kòe-lâi, hut-jiân iū iô-thâu, kóng:
"M̄-tio̍h. Nā tú tio̍h lí chit-khoán ê lâng, yi hoān-sè tō bē khí-siáu. Lí kā góa chit-ê hū-tam chih kòe lah, hó bô?"
"M̄-thang o͘-pe̍h kóng."
"Lí siūⁿ-kóng góa kóng chiú-ōe? Siūⁿ tio̍h yi tī lí sin-piⁿ, ē hō͘ lí thiàⁿ-sioh, góa tō ē-tàng tī chit-ê soaⁿ-khu hòng-tōng. Án-ne tō chiâⁿ sóng."
"Oeh!"
"Mài chhap góa." Komako kín kiâⁿ kúi-ā pō͘, "tòng" chi̍t-siaⁿ, soah khì chông tio̍h jia-hō͘ ê mûi-pang, chia sī yin chhù.
"In siūⁿ kóng lí bē tún lâi."
"Hmh, góa lâi khui."
Kng khí ki-ki koāiⁿ-koāiⁿ ê mûi-kha, kā sak khui, Komako khin-siaⁿ kóng:
"Ji̍p-lâi chē chi̍t-ē."
"Chit-ê sî-chūn..."
"Chhù lih ê lâng lóng khùn khì ah-lah."
Shimamura soah tiû-tî khí-lâi.
"Nā bô, góa sàng lí túiⁿ khì."
"M̄-bián lah."
"Bē-sái. Lí iáu m̄-bat khòaⁿ kòe góa chit-má ê pâng-keng."
Ùi chàu-kha mûi chi̍t ji̍p-khì, ba̍k-chêng khòaⁿ tio̍h chi̍t-ke-hóe-á khùn kah hoâiⁿ-tó ti̍t-ke̍h, kah pún-tē seh-khò͘ hit-khoán chit-liāu, í-keng thè-sek, tēng khì ê mî-phōe. Chhù-chú ang-á-bó͘ hām chi̍t-ê cha̍p-chhit/peh hòe ê ko͘-niû, iáu-ū gō͘/la̍k ê gín-á, tī àm-ûiⁿ ê teng-hóe ē-bīn sûi-lâng sûi hong-hiàng tih khùn. Sàn-chhiah ê tiong-kan, mā chhiong-móa tio̍h oa̍h-la̍t.
Shimamura chhèng tio̍h chi̍t-chūn bîn-chhn̂g ê sio khùi, siūⁿ boeh thè chhut gōa-kháu, Komako tī āu-piah í-keng "kho-lok" kā mûi koaiⁿ khí-lâi, koh khi-khi kho̍k-kho̍k ta̍h tē-pán ji̍p-khì, Shimamura tō ta̍h gín-á ê chím-thâu phāng neh-kha neh-chhiú kiâⁿ, ū chi̍t-chióng kî-koài ê sóng-khoài tī sim-koaⁿ chùn.
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82. 她可能會變做我 ê 負擔
"我毋是講耍笑. 毋知 án-nóa, 我看著她, 總是感覺, 以後她可能會變做我 ê 負擔. Tō 講是你, 你若佮意她, 你著好好 kā 觀察, 你 mā 會 án-ne 想." Komako kā 手扞 tī Shimamura ê 肩頭, 倚過來, 忽然又搖頭, 講:
"毋著. 若拄著你這款 ê 人, 她凡勢 tō 袂起痟. 你 kā 我這个負擔 chih 過 lah, 好無?"
"毋通烏白講."
"你想講我講酒話? 想著她 tī 你身邊, 會予你疼惜, 我 tō 會當 tī 這个山區放蕩. Án-ne tō 誠爽."
"Oeh!"
"莫 chhap 我." Komako 緊行幾 ā 步, "tòng" 一聲, 煞去傱著遮雨 ê mûi 枋, 遮是 姻厝.
"In 想講你袂 tún 來."
"Hmh, 我來開."
扛起 ki-ki koāiⁿ-koāiⁿ ê mûi 跤, kā 捒開, Komako 輕聲講:
"入來坐一下."
"這个時陣..."
"厝 lih ê 人攏睏去 ah-lah."
Shimamura 煞躊 tî 起來.
"若無, 我送你 túiⁿ 去."
"毋免 lah."
"袂使. 你猶 m̄-bat 看過我這馬 ê 房間."
Ùi 灶跤 mûi 一入去, 目前看著一家伙仔睏 kah 橫倒直扴, 蓋本地雪褲彼款質料, 已經退色, tēng 去 ê 棉被. 厝主翁仔某和一个十七八歲 ê 姑娘, 猶有五六个囡仔, tī 暗 ûiⁿ ê 燈火下面隨人隨方向 tih 睏. 散赤 ê 中間, mā 充滿著活力.
Shimamura 衝著一陣眠床 ê 燒氣, 想欲退出外口, Komako tī 後壁已經 "kho-lok" kā mûi 關起來, koh khi-khi kho̍k-kho̍k 踏地板入去, Shimamura tō 踏囡仔 ê 枕頭縫 neh 跤 neh 手行, 有一種奇怪 ê 爽快 tī 心肝顫.
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82.
"I'm not joking. Whenever I look at her, I feel as though I have a heavy load and can't get rid of it. Somehow I always feel that way. If you're really fond of her, take a good look at her. You'll see what I mean." She laid her hand on his shoulder and leaned toward him. Then, abruptly, she shook her head. "No, that's not what I want. If she were to fall into the hands of someone like you, she might not go crazy after all. Why don't you take my load for me?"
"You're going a little too far."
"You think I'm drunk and talking nonsense? I'm not. I would know she was being well taken care of, and I could go pleasantly to seed here in the mountains. It would be a fine, quiet feeling."
"That's enough."
"Just leave me alone." In her flight, she ran into the closed door of the house she lived in.
"They've decided you're not coming home."
"But I can open it." The door sounded old and dry as she lifted it from the groove and pushed it back.
"Come on in."
"But think of the hour." "Everyone will be asleep."
Shimamura hesitated.
"I'll see you back to the inn, then."
"I can go by myself."
"But you haven't seen my room."
They stepped through the kitchen door, and the sleeping figures of the family lay sprawled before them. The thin mattresses on the floor were covered with cheap striped cloth, now faded, of the sort often used for "mountain trousers." The mother and father and five or six children, the oldest a girl perhaps sixteen, lay under a scorched lampshade. Heads faced in every direction. There was drab poverty in the scene, and yet under it there lay an urgent, powerful vitality.
As if thrown back by the warm breath of all the sleepers, Shimamura started toward the door.
Komako noisily closed it in his face, however, and went in through the kitchen. She made no attempt to soften her footsteps. Shimamura followed stealthily past the children's pillows, a strange thrill rising in his chest.
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