38. Góa khì Tokyo, kan-ta i lâi sàng
"Hmh, m̄-koh, goán tōa-pō͘-hūn sī hun-khui seng-oa̍h ê. Góa hông bē khì Tokyo ê sî, kan-ta i lâi sàng góa. Góa thōng kū ê ji̍t-kì, khí-thâu tō sī kì chit-kiāⁿ tāi-chì."
"Lín nā lóng lâu tī hit-ê Káng-khu, hoān-sè taⁿ tō í-keng chò-hóe ah neh."
"Góa siūⁿ bô chit-lō tāi-chì."
"Án-ne hioh?"
"Lí bián thè pa̍t-lâng chhau-sim. I sī boeh sí ê lâng ah."
"M̄-koh, tī gōa-kháu kòe-mê chóng-sī m̄-hó lah."
"Lí ah, m̄-thang kóng hit-lō ōe. Góa chò góa kah-ì ê tāi-chì, boeh sí ê lâng kám ē-sái chó͘-tòng?"
Shimamura bô ōe thang ìn.
M̄-koh, Komako iáu-sī lóng bô kóng-tio̍h Yoko ê tāi-chì. Sī án-nóa neh?
Koh kóng Yoko, tī hóe-chhia lāi ná siàu-liân lāu-bú án-ne, choân-sim chiàu-kò͘, kā hit-ê cha-po͘-lâng chhōa tún lâi, chá-khí koh sàng thè-ōaⁿ ê saⁿ lâi hō͘ hām chit-ê cha-po͘ ū bó͘-chióng koan-hē ê Komako, yi ē án-nóa siūⁿ ah?
Shimamura chū án-ne iū-koh siūⁿ kah sit-sîn.
"Koma-Chan, Koma-Chan." He sī Yoko iu-bí ê kiò siaⁿ, im kē, m̄-koh chin chheng-chhó.
"Lâi ah. Ló͘-la̍t oh." Komako khiā khí-lâi, kiâⁿ kàu keh-piah saⁿ-tè pâng.
"Yoko San, lí lâi ah? Ai-ah, lóng-chóng the̍h lâi ah, che chiâⁿ tāng oh."
Yoko bô ìn-siaⁿ, oa̍t-thâu túiⁿ khì.
Komako iōng chéng-thâu-á ji̍h tūiⁿ tē-saⁿ hiân, ōaⁿ sin ê, koh kā im tiâu hó. Chit-tiong-kan, í-keng thiaⁿ ē chhut he khîm-im chiâⁿ chheng. Phōe-lô͘ téng phòng-phòng ê pau-ho̍k-kin phah-khui chi̍t-ē khòaⁿ, lāi-bīn tî liáu phó͘-thong ê kū ga̍k-phó͘, iáu ū jī-cha̍p gōa pún Kineya Yasushi (杵家彌七) siá ê "Bûn-hòa Samisen Phó͘". Shimamura kám-kak ì-gōa, kā the̍h tī chhiú lih, kóng:
"Khò chiah-ê liān hioh?"
"Sī án-ne, in-ūi tī chia bô sai-hū. Bô hoat-tō͘ lah."
"Lín tau m̄-sī ū sai-hū?"
"Yi tiòng-hong ah."
"Tiòng-hong oh, mā ē-sái iōng chhùi kà."
"Ōe mā kóng bē chheng-chhó ah. Thiàu-bú, yi iáu ē-sái iōng tò-chhiú lâi lia̍h-chiàⁿ, nā-sī samisen, yi kan-ta thiaⁿ tō hiâm chhò-hīⁿ ah."
--
38. 我去 Tokyo, 干焦伊來送
"Hmh, 毋過, 阮大部份是分開生活 ê. 我 hông 賣去 Tokyo ê 時, 干焦伊來送我. 我 thōng 舊 ê 日記, 起頭 tō 是記這件代誌."
"恁若攏留 tī 彼个港區, 凡勢今 tō 已經做伙 ah neh."
"我想無 chit-lō 代誌."
"Án-ne hioh?"
"你免替別人操心. 伊是欲死 ê 人 ah."
"毋過, tī 外口過暝總是毋好 lah."
"你 ah, 毋通講 hit-lō 話. 我做我佮意 ê 代誌, 欲死 ê 人敢會使阻擋?"
Shimamura 無話通應.
毋過, Komako 猶是攏無講著 Yoko ê 代誌. 是 án-nóa neh?
閣講 Yoko, tī 火車內 ná 少年老母 án-ne, 全心照顧, kā 彼个查埔人 chhōa tún 來, 早起 koh 送替換 ê 衫來予和這个查埔有某種關係 ê Komako, 她會 án-nóa 想 ah?
Shimamura 自 án-ne 又閣想 kah 失神.
"Koma-Chan, Koma-Chan." 彼是 Yoko 優美 ê 叫聲, 音低, 毋過真清楚.
"來 ah. Ló͘-la̍t oh." Komako 徛起來, 行到隔壁三塊房.
"Yoko San, 你來 ah? Ai-ah, 攏總提來 ah, 這誠重 oh."
Yoko 無應聲, 越頭 túiⁿ 去.
Komako 用指頭仔揤 tūiⁿ 第三弦, 換新 ê, koh kā 音 tiâu 好. 這中間, 已經聽會出 he 琴音誠清. 被爐頂膨膨 ê 包袱巾拍開一下看, 內面除了普通 ê 舊樂譜, 猶有二十外本 Kineya Yasushi (杵家彌七) 寫 ê "文化 Samisen 譜". Shimamura 感覺意外, kā 提 tī 手 lih, 講:
"靠 chiah-ê 練 hioh?"
"是 án-ne, 因為 tī 遮無師傅. 無法度 lah."
"恁兜毋是有師傅?"
"她中風 ah."
"中風 oh, mā ē-sái 用喙教."
"話 mā 講袂清楚 ah. 跳舞, 她猶 ē-sái 用倒手來掠正, 若是 samisen, 她干焦聽 tō 嫌噪耳 ah."
--
38.
"That's right. But we've lived most of our lives apart. When they sent me to Tokyo to be a geisha, he was the only one who saw me off. I have that written down on the very first page of my very oldest diary."
"If the two of you had stayed together, you'd probably be married by now."
"I doubt it."
"You would be, though."
"You needn't worry about him. He'll be dead before long."
"But is it right for you to be spending your nights away from home?"
"It's not right for you to ask. How can a dying man keep me from doing as I like?"
Shimamura could think of no answer.
Why was it that Komako said not a word about the girl Yoko?
And Yoko, who had taken care of the sick man on the train, quite as his mother must have when he was very young-how would she feel coming to an inn with a change of kimono for Komako, who was something, Shimamura could not know what, to the man Yoko had come home with?
Shimamura found himself off in his usual distant fantasies.
"Komako, Komako." Yoko's beautiful voice was low but clear.
"Thank you very much." Komako went out to the dressing-room. "You brought it yourself, did you? It must have been heavy."
Yoko left immediately.
The top string snapped as Komako plucked tentatively at the samisen. Shimamura could tell even while she was changing the string and tuning the instrument that she had a firm, confident touch. She took up a bulky bundle and undid it on the kotatsu. Inside were an ordinary book of lyrics and some twenty scores. Shimamura glanced curiously at the latter.
"You practice from these?"
"I have to. There's no one here who can teach me."
"What about the woman you live with?"
"She's paralyzed."
"If she can talk she ought to be able to help you."
"But she can't talk. She can still use her left hand to correct mistakes in dancing, but it only annoys her to have to listen to the samisen and not be able to do anything about it."
--
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